Buy your Friends at Usocial

 A company called Usocial will let you buy your friends and followers in bulk.

Yes, for $87 you can buy 1000 Twitter followers or for $197 1000 Facebook friends, not bad less than .20 cents a friend, and much cheaper than buying friends at your local campus bar during dollar drink night.

So I was thinking of alternative ways they can advertise and sell their product.

Are you a talentless Hollywood reality star who wants to prove that other people really care what you think? Well, now this is your chance by showing them that you have thousands of Twitter followers who pretend to care.

Or when you're arrested for being a serial killer do you want to be like the others and hear the police and your neighbors saying, he was a quite loner who kept to himself.   No, then prepare and prove them wrong with your countless Facebook friends from around the world.

But wait, if you act in the next 30 minutes we can double your order of friends at no additional cost. Because think about it, your real life friends may be cheap, but these ones are cheaper, and they won't borrow your stuff or steal your boyfriend or girlfriend.